With a toddler, the difference between a relaxing stay and a stressful one, for me, comes down to where we stay.
When my toddler first started to walk, we stayed in a vacation rental that I would have previously described as charming. The kind of old New England house with all the nooks and crannies. Shelves of old books and knicknacks. Clawfooted tubs. A wide porch overlooking the mountains. I love houses with character. (I spent a lot of youth watching HGTV pre-Chip and Joanna Gaines shiplap/gray.)
But that charm meant a very, very stressful few days trying to keep my toddler from falling down random sets of stairs or breaking an antique knicknack. No air conditioning in 90-degree heat meant a last-minute run to Wal-mart to buy an expensive in-window air conditioner we couldn’t even take home.
So a no-brainer rental turned into a total nightmare.
Always chasing white sand beaches and hydrangeas all summer long with this little one.
That experience put me firmly on team “hotel” for a while. The idea of doing dishes on vacation just bums me out. But as my toddler gets a little older, I am coming back around to renting, especially as I look at summer plans.
Pull together your list of requirements ahead of time
I fall into this trap with searching for rentals where I fall in love with a property and then realize it doesn’t have, y’know, a useable kitchen. Every trip is a little different—if I’m staying at a beach house, for example, I already know I’m gonna need laundry with all of that sand.
I was pulling together research for this vacation rentals piece when reader Allison commented on another post:
Having the ~right~ accommodation is absolutely a driving factor in my travel planning for my little family! These days it is more often an apartment or home rental, but being able to have solid, comfortable sleeping arrangements, kitchen/laundry, walkable location with grocery amenities & activities, and safe outdoor space (preferably with a view, to enjoy for apéro or after bedtime) go a LONG way to making travelling with little people feel as much like a vacation as it can!
I loved this list of requirements, as it’s similar to my own list:
- At a minimum, two bedrooms or a bedroom/common room that allows for separate sleep. At this point we’re out of a crib, but having a travel crib is super helpful.
- Kitchen with an actual oven/microwave/dishwasher and a high chair. (Nothing I hate more than doing dishes on vacation!!)
- Laundry, especially if we’re going for more than 2 days.
- A/C is a must for us, which is tricky in other countries but well worth it. (I’ll never forget a fantastic stay in Cordoba, Spain, where the real-feel was 110.)
- A rec room or a play area stocked with toys is not a *must* but wow does it make a stay so much more fun.
- Similarly, if there’s a backyard, a swingset or a pool.
- Walkable or short drive to a playground, beach, library, or park if there isn’t a backyard.
That’s a LOT of things to think about. And it’s funny looking at the list of filters in AirBnb or VRBO like, a hair dryer is *so* far away from the things I need in this rental right now. 😂
A snapshot of the filters I always use when looking for vacation rentals.
Scope out the location and don’t be afraid to rebook
Once, pre-kids, I booked an AirBnb nearby some of the main attractions in Buenos Aires, or so I thought. I messaged a friend of mine in the city to tell her where I was staying, and thought that was that…but I had accidentally booked a spot completely on the other side of the city, just with a similar location name. Whoops!
Not every vacation rental has an easy cancellation policy, but if you can, double check where you booked and whether or not the neighborhood is actually on the water/near the Children’s Museum/next to the supermarket.
Babyproof as you unpack
The most difficult part of “kid-friendly” or “baby-friendly” marketing in hospitality is that there’s no one definition of what that even means. Do they have tamper-proof outlets? Baby gates? A bathtub? Or is it just that they have some toys and a swingset and it’s close to a playground? All those things are great, but I’m always looking for a place that can get me as close to a “vacation” mindset as possible.
Some of that you can find out ahead of time by messaging the host. But the rest usually requires a careful sweep as soon as I get to a place. When I’m with my partner usually one of us peels off to contain the toddler for a moment by setting up the crib (or now inflatable bed/slumberpod) and the other is pushing furniture against walls, duct taping outlets, moving sharp or precious things from stupid places (I once had to move all the knives out of a BOTTOM DRAWER, an absolutely nonsensical choice for toddlers and for cooks). You really never know what you’re going to find when you walk in, and so I like to take a beat to make sure we can navigate the space without any preventable mishaps.
Maybe your toddler isn’t the kind that will find any dangerous item and put it in their mouth…but mine was, and honestly, sometimes still is.
Once we finish ~all that~ it’s like, okay. Release the kraken, I mean toddler!!
Thanks for being here.
Warm or cold our goal is always to be near a body of water.
Time management is one of the hardest parts of motherhood. Wanting to spend time with my little one adds so much pressure to all the other parts of my life—squeezing writing this newsletter and oh yeah, my actual work, into the nooks and crannies of early mornings, weekends, and nights. It feels *hard* when I just need A MINUTE TO FINISH THIS SENTENCE PLEASE –
It’s not about the time to do it, it’s about the mental space. I can’t drop into flow when every 30 seconds little feet come in and interrupt me. I know I’ll miss this, but capitalism doesn’t stop just because my adorable toddler just made a new play-doh creation.
To “having it all,”
Kayla
If you liked this post, please consider supporting my work. I’m just a mom in the thick of the toddler years trying to create core memories for our whole family while minimizing meltdowns—I sincerely hope this helps you do the same.
This post was originally published on Travel with Toddlers. Subscribe for more real-talk travel advice, toddler-friendly itineraries, and tried-and-true gear recommendations.
